Saturday, October 3, 2009

This Month

I think I'm going to pull a Natasha...

Cause really, I'm just not entirely motivated to get much done. I've had the whole month of September to work on Math and English and I've barely touched them both. I can still finish them and Bio before December ends, it just means more rushing. More doing stuff at the last minute. Which is something that I always seem to be doing. Procrastinating a bit.

Not to mention that I have no job, no time for a job actually to get this all done and am just mis-managing my time. I planned on working on school work for large parts of the day, everyday, but I haven't. Getting programming stuff done, working on stuff so its fresh in my mind come January, but I've barely done that either.

So, essentially I'm unmotivated. Something that has followed me for the past two years or so. I just don't seem to care. Well, I do care, I'm just too unmotivated to do anything. Be it self-discipline, self-esteem, self-control, or all of the above.

So I'm unbalanced. Either wasting time reading books all the day long (such as the Wheel of Time series, which is awesome by the way) or just surfing the net. Its easier to waste time than to crack open the text book and get started.

Obviously this needs to change. I'm not sure how, but it needs to. Maybe I'll receive the answer on how to change the direction of my life through Conference. That's what it is for right?



Amanda said...

I can relate to this (ha I don't even know you but you commented on my blog and I assume you know Rachel so it works) It's so hard to be motivated, I feel like all i do ever is homework and studying, I too don't have a job, yet I look back on my days and try to figure out what I accomplished and it feels like nothing. But yes, conference, it's a wonderful thing!

Sam, The Nanti-SARRMM said...

You assume correctly.