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Wednesday, July 30, 2008
No it isn't a Straight Jacket
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Monday, July 28, 2008
Secret Agencies
In other news, maybe completely unrelated to anything else, I have now joined the ranks of some top secret organization. Heh heh heh.
Well it's not really top secret, it is of course with BYU, but before I start divulging names and such, I need to investigate. So more information will be coming within the next few weeks. If I don't pop a lung in the process...
Well it's not really top secret, it is of course with BYU, but before I start divulging names and such, I need to investigate. So more information will be coming within the next few weeks. If I don't pop a lung in the process...
Labels:
Myself
Creepy Crawlers
I am not the best of roommates. It's not that I don't get along with them, it's just that I frequently talk in my sleep and say crazy things in English and Spanish. With my current roommate, this has not been a problem. He is here from Hawaii over the summer to save up some money for school, and frankly "Ted" sleeps like a log. He also happens to get up around two or so in the morning to go to work usually.
Now frankly, there are times that I wake up, and I either remember vaguely, or not at all. Sometimes, like on my mission, I remember about being slightly woken up by a lot of cats, saying something that there was a great cat war, and asleep again. I only remembered because my mission companion told me about it.
And then there are nights, like last night, where I sort of woke up because my roommate was stirring about, and then going to sleep again. When I went to leave to work today, I discovered Ted on the couch asleep. I assumed two things, one he had missed work, and two, he was probably on the couch because I was speaking in my sleep.
Being concerned that he was way late for work, I woke him up slightly, and asked him about work. It turns out he wasn't scheduled today, but was on call in case. But he also said that I woke him up twice because I was speaking Spanish in my sleep and also that I was typing at my computer too.
So I have pushed the bar in terms of sleeping disorders, there are many people who sleep walk, but I have pushed the limits and now type in my sleep.
So please please don't hold anything against me if I post something in the early morning hours. Thank you.
Now frankly, there are times that I wake up, and I either remember vaguely, or not at all. Sometimes, like on my mission, I remember about being slightly woken up by a lot of cats, saying something that there was a great cat war, and asleep again. I only remembered because my mission companion told me about it.
And then there are nights, like last night, where I sort of woke up because my roommate was stirring about, and then going to sleep again. When I went to leave to work today, I discovered Ted on the couch asleep. I assumed two things, one he had missed work, and two, he was probably on the couch because I was speaking in my sleep.
Being concerned that he was way late for work, I woke him up slightly, and asked him about work. It turns out he wasn't scheduled today, but was on call in case. But he also said that I woke him up twice because I was speaking Spanish in my sleep and also that I was typing at my computer too.
So I have pushed the bar in terms of sleeping disorders, there are many people who sleep walk, but I have pushed the limits and now type in my sleep.
So please please don't hold anything against me if I post something in the early morning hours. Thank you.
What's in a name.
I though of posting a huge long exposition as to what was occurring when I took up the nym of SARRMM, but truth be told, that tale is grim and harrowing, and there's nothing funny about that period of time, well not yet anyways.
Now this is the story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute just sit right there
I’ll tell you how I became SARRMM of the 100 Hour Board
Yeah, I best not slaughter the theme song to the Fresh Prince of Bel Aire, tis far too sacred to commit such sacrilege.
So to get to the point, I was two months of my mission when school started September 2007, I soon saw my own social inadequacies, the lack of social grace due to the mission and perhaps due to earlier pre-mission dorkiness. With class difficulty and dating troubles, my own self esteem and self worth plummeted until I lost almost all desire to actually live my life and for a small period of time in November skipped my classes, and stayed in my apartment messing around on my computer and going to work at wal-mart. I managed to pull myself out of the hole with help from a friend, but not in time to salvage most of my grades. But all along that time I wasn't social, I hardly did anything with friends and just viewed myself as a social geek, and believing a self perpetuated lie that I hadn't progressed.
At the same time I visited a friend at the Library security desk, talking with him, relieving pressures and all that. He starts talking about a website where students answer questions anonymously, the 100 Hour Board. After a bit I posed some questions, and my friend actually asked them, using my full actual name to my surprise when I started viewing it. (You can easily find them if you search) When I asked my first question it was as the Super Awkward Recently Returned Missionary Man.
I also started using that name for other questions. Sometimes I asked using it, sometimes I didn't, but as time passed, I started feeling better about myself, started dating a lovely lady and posted a question with a change to the SARRMM.
In a way it was symbolic, because I was overcoming myself and thus wasn't so super awkward, or such an RM, the debate is still up in air about 'Man' though. Heh heh.
Around March or so, I found the Board Message Board where I was dubbed Sam in attempts to discern a nickname for me, and around May or so the N crept up to my name.
So that is the story
that I had to tell y'all
of a little salt lake boy
and his strange strange name.
I believe SWKT was asked about as well, SWKT is another person that is on the message board as well, who is probably a secondary account of someone's. SWKT started out snarky, and antagonistic, but of late SWKT has grown on me. I would tell more, but the world isn't ready for more.
Well there you go! Have a great monday!
Now this is the story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute just sit right there
I’ll tell you how I became SARRMM of the 100 Hour Board
Yeah, I best not slaughter the theme song to the Fresh Prince of Bel Aire, tis far too sacred to commit such sacrilege.
So to get to the point, I was two months of my mission when school started September 2007, I soon saw my own social inadequacies, the lack of social grace due to the mission and perhaps due to earlier pre-mission dorkiness. With class difficulty and dating troubles, my own self esteem and self worth plummeted until I lost almost all desire to actually live my life and for a small period of time in November skipped my classes, and stayed in my apartment messing around on my computer and going to work at wal-mart. I managed to pull myself out of the hole with help from a friend, but not in time to salvage most of my grades. But all along that time I wasn't social, I hardly did anything with friends and just viewed myself as a social geek, and believing a self perpetuated lie that I hadn't progressed.
At the same time I visited a friend at the Library security desk, talking with him, relieving pressures and all that. He starts talking about a website where students answer questions anonymously, the 100 Hour Board. After a bit I posed some questions, and my friend actually asked them, using my full actual name to my surprise when I started viewing it. (You can easily find them if you search) When I asked my first question it was as the Super Awkward Recently Returned Missionary Man.
I also started using that name for other questions. Sometimes I asked using it, sometimes I didn't, but as time passed, I started feeling better about myself, started dating a lovely lady and posted a question with a change to the SARRMM.
In a way it was symbolic, because I was overcoming myself and thus wasn't so super awkward, or such an RM, the debate is still up in air about 'Man' though. Heh heh.
Around March or so, I found the Board Message Board where I was dubbed Sam in attempts to discern a nickname for me, and around May or so the N crept up to my name.
So that is the story
that I had to tell y'all
of a little salt lake boy
and his strange strange name.
I believe SWKT was asked about as well, SWKT is another person that is on the message board as well, who is probably a secondary account of someone's. SWKT started out snarky, and antagonistic, but of late SWKT has grown on me. I would tell more, but the world isn't ready for more.
Well there you go! Have a great monday!
Labels:
Myself
Friday, July 25, 2008
Copycat Weekend fill-in
I have decided to be un-original and do what Chilly is doing, a fill in thing-a-majig.
1. I believe whatever doesn't kill you will have failed to stop you in your plans to take over the world. Or is Hobbes, leaving you alive to witness the anarchy he spreads as he conquers the world
2. If you're good at something, you can always become better.
3. Why so serious?.
4. Something is out there, it's just too lazy and bored to show itself.
5. If my life were a sitcom, it would be titled The mis-adventures of SWKT and Sam.
6. Sitting on my back porch [if you don't have one, use your imagination] I see the gateways to the Marvel Universe where Stephen Colbert is President of the United States and I now desire to be there.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to hanging with some friends, tomorrow my plans include visiting my family and seeing other friendsand Sunday, I may just get up the energy to take a nap.
In other exciting news, thanks to the wonders of Google Analytics, installed this Monday, it has been determined that this blog is now international. Yes, it is true, my brain washing scheme to make you all my loyal puppets has also reached a citizen of the UK and Switzerland. I can now only wonder if SARRMM means some vulgar term in the swiss language. If it does. I do apologize viewer, no harm was meant.
My next installment, as asked by Allyourbase, and the apparent vulgarity of SARRMM in swiss, will be the meaning behind the name, behind SARRMM.
All I ask is to ready some tissues, because it is a truly heartfelt story that will move your heart to tears, or bring tears to your eyes by how much you may be laughing. So ready the Kleenex!
1. I believe whatever doesn't kill you will have failed to stop you in your plans to take over the world. Or is Hobbes, leaving you alive to witness the anarchy he spreads as he conquers the world
2. If you're good at something, you can always become better.
3. Why so serious?.
4. Something is out there, it's just too lazy and bored to show itself.
5. If my life were a sitcom, it would be titled The mis-adventures of SWKT and Sam.
6. Sitting on my back porch [if you don't have one, use your imagination] I see the gateways to the Marvel Universe where Stephen Colbert is President of the United States and I now desire to be there.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to hanging with some friends, tomorrow my plans include visiting my family and seeing other friendsand Sunday, I may just get up the energy to take a nap.
In other exciting news, thanks to the wonders of Google Analytics, installed this Monday, it has been determined that this blog is now international. Yes, it is true, my brain washing scheme to make you all my loyal puppets has also reached a citizen of the UK and Switzerland. I can now only wonder if SARRMM means some vulgar term in the swiss language. If it does. I do apologize viewer, no harm was meant.
My next installment, as asked by Allyourbase, and the apparent vulgarity of SARRMM in swiss, will be the meaning behind the name, behind SARRMM.
All I ask is to ready some tissues, because it is a truly heartfelt story that will move your heart to tears, or bring tears to your eyes by how much you may be laughing. So ready the Kleenex!
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Things that make me laugh
A list of things that have made me laugh thus far today. Most are tshirts that I received links of from coworkers trying to kill me.
![Mccain for president](http://6.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/f/f/bustedtees.fa6ec8afef4d858e535cd22fac1032f4.gif)
![old video games!](http://0.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/3/9/bustedtees.a3b81723f1f9dc79324c59394b1ed790.gif)
![Overthrown regimes not refundable.](http://9.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/1/c/bustedtees.55b45b31c617a9dac4a1d33c53aa998c.gif)
![If you can read this, I am.](http://0.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/b/6/bustedtees.6d334fcb7043779872a03816e55c840e.gif)
![Oregon trail was fun.](http://1.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/8/c/bustedtees.74038ee811857a416f55ca1c72fd0634.jpg)
![o_O](http://7.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/3/4/bustedtees.5e1d0dd3e85cbd826c06d2e4570e4ec4.gif)
Also, my coworkers left to grab lunch from Burger King, I gave them some money and told them to get the triple whopper burger since I volunteered to man the phones. So we eat, Serina, the only girl in our team, had ordered a happy meal thing and gave me the Pokemon toy that came with it. I think I'll keep it, the trading card will go to my siblings, but the little toy I'll keep.
Anyways, getting off topic. Serina also happens tobribe bring deserts she makes each week, this week bringing delicious brownies. We had all eaten probably three days worth of calories and Selina went to grab a brownie. Now being the only girl, we constantly joke around with her. Selina also happens to be a very active girl, very confident, and witty, so when she went for a brownie our team lead Bruce mentioned all the calories she had ate and Selina quickly responded humorously that she would just throw it up all later.
Now, many of those t-shirts got me chuckling a bit, but with that comment, it just set me off and I was laughing for the next couple of minutes to the brink of wheezing. Now for those of you who don't know, I am known for my much laughter, for several minutes and to the point of laughter. It can be funny things, but also things that are out of character, or unexpected set me off as well, along with inane things. Anyways, due to much laughter one night I contracted asthma. So I am slightly wheezing now from my laughing fit. What fun.
On a completely un-related note, SWKT is logged into the message board at the moment. I am excited. SWKT is one of those snarky people who grow on you, and you can't wait to see what they say next.
Adios!
![Mccain for president](http://6.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/f/f/bustedtees.fa6ec8afef4d858e535cd22fac1032f4.gif)
![old video games!](http://0.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/3/9/bustedtees.a3b81723f1f9dc79324c59394b1ed790.gif)
![Overthrown regimes not refundable.](http://9.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/1/c/bustedtees.55b45b31c617a9dac4a1d33c53aa998c.gif)
![If you can read this, I am.](http://0.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/b/6/bustedtees.6d334fcb7043779872a03816e55c840e.gif)
![Oregon trail was fun.](http://1.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/8/c/bustedtees.74038ee811857a416f55ca1c72fd0634.jpg)
![o_O](http://7.media.bustedtees.com/bustedtees/mf/3/4/bustedtees.5e1d0dd3e85cbd826c06d2e4570e4ec4.gif)
Also, my coworkers left to grab lunch from Burger King, I gave them some money and told them to get the triple whopper burger since I volunteered to man the phones. So we eat, Serina, the only girl in our team, had ordered a happy meal thing and gave me the Pokemon toy that came with it. I think I'll keep it, the trading card will go to my siblings, but the little toy I'll keep.
Anyways, getting off topic. Serina also happens to
Now, many of those t-shirts got me chuckling a bit, but with that comment, it just set me off and I was laughing for the next couple of minutes to the brink of wheezing. Now for those of you who don't know, I am known for my much laughter, for several minutes and to the point of laughter. It can be funny things, but also things that are out of character, or unexpected set me off as well, along with inane things. Anyways, due to much laughter one night I contracted asthma. So I am slightly wheezing now from my laughing fit. What fun.
On a completely un-related note, SWKT is logged into the message board at the moment. I am excited. SWKT is one of those snarky people who grow on you, and you can't wait to see what they say next.
Adios!
The unanswered question
There are some age old questions, or even new age questions that many don't know the answer to and would like to know them. Like how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop. Only in this case, we now have the answer, and no, it has nothing to do with tootsie pops. The question is, how many tazerings does it take to kill a man? Apparently the answer is nine.
Seriously now, this sort of thing should not happen.
Yeah, of course something happened to cause him to go into cardiac arrest, it's called 450,000 volts of electricity flowing through his body over the course of 20 minutes or so. Right, that isn't deadly or harmful at all.
Now apparently the cop is arguing that using the tazer was justified, after all, he was trying to apprehend a guy 100 pounds heavier than himself. So yes, tazing him once is ok, twice questionable, but six times in three minutes? The once more in the back of the cop car and two more times after being pulled out onto the concrete? That is over the top, and shows that Nugent, the cop in question, either has a big stress problem, or an anger management problem, and should not have been out in the streets, especially since Nugent is responsible for 10 of the 14 taserings that have occurred in that city.
At the very least I think the cop should be sentenced to involuntary manslaughter, assuming his lawyer manages to convince the jury that it was an accident. This type of thing should not happen and I hope that the cop is convicted. I would hope those like Nugent are taken out of positions of power that they use to abuse people.
Yeah, just thought I'd put my two cents in about this. That is all.
Seriously now, this sort of thing should not happen.
But Winnfield police Lt. Chuck Curry said race "isn't an issue at all" in the matter.
"This has come down to a police officer that was trying to apprehend a suspect that they had warrants for," he said. "He done what he thought he was trained to do to bring that subject into custody. At some point, something happened with his body that caused him to go into cardiac arrest or whatever."
Yeah, of course something happened to cause him to go into cardiac arrest, it's called 450,000 volts of electricity flowing through his body over the course of 20 minutes or so. Right, that isn't deadly or harmful at all.
Now apparently the cop is arguing that using the tazer was justified, after all, he was trying to apprehend a guy 100 pounds heavier than himself. So yes, tazing him once is ok, twice questionable, but six times in three minutes? The once more in the back of the cop car and two more times after being pulled out onto the concrete? That is over the top, and shows that Nugent, the cop in question, either has a big stress problem, or an anger management problem, and should not have been out in the streets, especially since Nugent is responsible for 10 of the 14 taserings that have occurred in that city.
At the very least I think the cop should be sentenced to involuntary manslaughter, assuming his lawyer manages to convince the jury that it was an accident. This type of thing should not happen and I hope that the cop is convicted. I would hope those like Nugent are taken out of positions of power that they use to abuse people.
Yeah, just thought I'd put my two cents in about this. That is all.
Labels:
Politics
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Hilariousness
One of my old roommates commented on my status in facebook about sql statements. He included this comic. I must say it is quite hilarious. Long live XKCD!!!
![](http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/exploits_of_a_mom.png)
Labels:
Humor
The Waterfall
Well I think I had half a mountain on my pants last night.
You see, last night my FHE group went up to Bridal Veil Falls, and half of us hiked up to it. It was cool. It was actually my first time visiting it. I also thought that the restaurant at the top of the mountain was some abandoned Forest Ranger Outlook post with a pulley system to bring up supplies. I was thoroughly corrected by the 100 hour board archives when I looked into earlier today.
Anyways, we're at the top, we take pictures, and then head back down. Only instead of coming exactly the way we came, the person leading decided to take us down another path, one quite slippery that caused most of us to slide on our butts most of the way down, and me being the most graceful of us all (sarcasm alert!!!) I went last with clouds of dust in my wake. Then imagine clouds of dust coming up as I tried to dust off myself. Yeah, it was just barely enough to start to tickle my asthma. Luckily it wasn't set off. Almost though. Hearing one one of the girls talk about past experiences of flirting with guys in other cars and getting them to pull their pants down... well lets just say we were lucky we were stopped at a red light cause that got me laughing hard, and I happened to be driving.
Also, I have realized that having five people in the Tin Can Mobile causes it to groan and make weird noises from the back end. Like a creepy old house.
You see, last night my FHE group went up to Bridal Veil Falls, and half of us hiked up to it. It was cool. It was actually my first time visiting it. I also thought that the restaurant at the top of the mountain was some abandoned Forest Ranger Outlook post with a pulley system to bring up supplies. I was thoroughly corrected by the 100 hour board archives when I looked into earlier today.
Anyways, we're at the top, we take pictures, and then head back down. Only instead of coming exactly the way we came, the person leading decided to take us down another path, one quite slippery that caused most of us to slide on our butts most of the way down, and me being the most graceful of us all (sarcasm alert!!!) I went last with clouds of dust in my wake. Then imagine clouds of dust coming up as I tried to dust off myself. Yeah, it was just barely enough to start to tickle my asthma. Luckily it wasn't set off. Almost though. Hearing one one of the girls talk about past experiences of flirting with guys in other cars and getting them to pull their pants down... well lets just say we were lucky we were stopped at a red light cause that got me laughing hard, and I happened to be driving.
Also, I have realized that having five people in the Tin Can Mobile causes it to groan and make weird noises from the back end. Like a creepy old house.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Friday, July 18, 2008
Other weird dreams
I was walking down the street. It was sunny. Typical for Utah. I knew there was a point and time I had to meet up with them to discuss the latest mission, but I had to be casual about it, no mess ups, no one could afford to know who I was working for, who I was meeting. I thought I was safe, I thought I had been careful. I was wrong.
I don't know how they knew, nor how they found me, but turning the suburban corner speeding towards me was a red convertible with three lovely ladies seated inside. As they spoke to me, I knew my cover was blown.
"Hey Nanti! How are you doing" Shouted one of the blond headed girls. The other two giggled at her side as they pulled up beside me.
"Umm.. Fine I guess, how -" but the driver interrupted, asking "Where are they, we know they're here and that you're going to meet them."
I knew I couldn't tell them, not when I was houses away from the safe house. If I told, the consequences would be dire, chaos would ensue, a riot would form as soon as their whereabouts would become public. They had after all worked long and hard maintaining secrecy, hiding their identities and only a select few citizen who the agent picked out himself from the endless applications decided who would get to see his face. There could be no telling what would happen if their identities were made known, so I did the one thing any guy would do when questioned by a hostile female; lie.
"They're just 6 houses to the right of the next street." I tried to say in a hopefully still surprised tone.
The three girls smiled at each other, "This is too easy, like taking candy from a Baby", said the girl in shotgun. With a rev of the engine they sped off, giggling.
I knew I didn't have moments to spare, thankfully the actual house was just two yards away. Running quickly up to the door I knocked twice and the door opened.
"Welcome Agent SARRMM, you're a tad late." Said a man in a blue Sunday shirt, tan pants, glasses and short dark hair.
"Yes Agent Claudio, I ran into some trouble."
"I hope you weren't followed, either way, Agent Foreman will be down in a minute, he had some business to attend to." Barely were those words out of his mouth when three loud knocks came from the front door. Agent Claudio through me a sideways saying "Not followed eh?" while I just sat down, leaning foreward with my face buried in my hands, waiting for the right moment to plug my ears.
The door was not open for more than a second before the three same young ladies burst in, screaming like giddy little girls at a Hannah Montana Concert, "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" All talking about how cute Agent Foreman was. Agent Claudio let out a sigh while he looked at his watch.
The next few minutes were uncomfortable, Agent Claudio looked bored, fielding a question every now and then from the incredibly hyper girls who mostly were talking to themselves about like how great the weather was, you know, and like how incredibly lucky they were to finally meet the incredible Foreman, in that obnoxious Preppy high school valley "like hello" accent.
Another minute passed by before Agent Foreman entered the room, causing more squealing and shouting. "You certainly took you're time" Claudio mentioned to Foreman. "I heard we had unexpected guests, and I guess they are after these." Foreman responded, waving some papers in the air that each of the three females watched in wonderlust, following every movement of them.
Turning to the females, Foreman handed each of them one of the sheets of paper and a pen. "Okay Ladies, you probably have heard about these applications before judging by the looks on your faces, so fill them out and hand them back." Turning back towards us he saw the incredulous look on my face and said, "This will only take a few minutes Agent SARRMM, then we can brief you."
The next few minutes passed uneventfully while Foreman chatted with the ladies while they filled out the applications that Foreman had given them, receiving a question or two from Claudio as well, and just generally being charmed over by that famous Agent Foreman charm and wit until at last they had completed the applications and handed them back over to Foreman.
"Thank you ladies, I'll review these and get back with you shortly." He said, winking at them as he took their applications and showed them the door.
As soon as the door was closed, Agent Foreman turned back to me saying "Sorry for the wait Agent SARRMM, this seems to happen every so often. So lets brief you on your mission..."
That is all of the dream that I remember, or maybe it ended there, I don't recall. But memory of the dream came about while talking to Chilly. But I hope you enjoyed the second view into my dreams.
I really need to get out more often though.
I don't know how they knew, nor how they found me, but turning the suburban corner speeding towards me was a red convertible with three lovely ladies seated inside. As they spoke to me, I knew my cover was blown.
"Hey Nanti! How are you doing" Shouted one of the blond headed girls. The other two giggled at her side as they pulled up beside me.
"Umm.. Fine I guess, how -" but the driver interrupted, asking "Where are they, we know they're here and that you're going to meet them."
I knew I couldn't tell them, not when I was houses away from the safe house. If I told, the consequences would be dire, chaos would ensue, a riot would form as soon as their whereabouts would become public. They had after all worked long and hard maintaining secrecy, hiding their identities and only a select few citizen who the agent picked out himself from the endless applications decided who would get to see his face. There could be no telling what would happen if their identities were made known, so I did the one thing any guy would do when questioned by a hostile female; lie.
"They're just 6 houses to the right of the next street." I tried to say in a hopefully still surprised tone.
The three girls smiled at each other, "This is too easy, like taking candy from a Baby", said the girl in shotgun. With a rev of the engine they sped off, giggling.
I knew I didn't have moments to spare, thankfully the actual house was just two yards away. Running quickly up to the door I knocked twice and the door opened.
"Welcome Agent SARRMM, you're a tad late." Said a man in a blue Sunday shirt, tan pants, glasses and short dark hair.
"Yes Agent Claudio, I ran into some trouble."
"I hope you weren't followed, either way, Agent Foreman will be down in a minute, he had some business to attend to." Barely were those words out of his mouth when three loud knocks came from the front door. Agent Claudio through me a sideways saying "Not followed eh?" while I just sat down, leaning foreward with my face buried in my hands, waiting for the right moment to plug my ears.
The door was not open for more than a second before the three same young ladies burst in, screaming like giddy little girls at a Hannah Montana Concert, "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" All talking about how cute Agent Foreman was. Agent Claudio let out a sigh while he looked at his watch.
The next few minutes were uncomfortable, Agent Claudio looked bored, fielding a question every now and then from the incredibly hyper girls who mostly were talking to themselves about like how great the weather was, you know, and like how incredibly lucky they were to finally meet the incredible Foreman, in that obnoxious Preppy high school valley "like hello" accent.
Another minute passed by before Agent Foreman entered the room, causing more squealing and shouting. "You certainly took you're time" Claudio mentioned to Foreman. "I heard we had unexpected guests, and I guess they are after these." Foreman responded, waving some papers in the air that each of the three females watched in wonderlust, following every movement of them.
Turning to the females, Foreman handed each of them one of the sheets of paper and a pen. "Okay Ladies, you probably have heard about these applications before judging by the looks on your faces, so fill them out and hand them back." Turning back towards us he saw the incredulous look on my face and said, "This will only take a few minutes Agent SARRMM, then we can brief you."
The next few minutes passed uneventfully while Foreman chatted with the ladies while they filled out the applications that Foreman had given them, receiving a question or two from Claudio as well, and just generally being charmed over by that famous Agent Foreman charm and wit until at last they had completed the applications and handed them back over to Foreman.
"Thank you ladies, I'll review these and get back with you shortly." He said, winking at them as he took their applications and showed them the door.
As soon as the door was closed, Agent Foreman turned back to me saying "Sorry for the wait Agent SARRMM, this seems to happen every so often. So lets brief you on your mission..."
That is all of the dream that I remember, or maybe it ended there, I don't recall. But memory of the dream came about while talking to Chilly. But I hope you enjoyed the second view into my dreams.
I really need to get out more often though.
Labels:
Dreams,
My Writings
Strange Dreams
I have mentioned some of my dream weirdness to a couple of you, but last night, well it was just crazy, and further proof the my subconscience hates me and that I need to get out more often.
Here I was on a computer, either at home or at work and I started IMing Dragon Lady saying I changed her last name on the program that my team administers, to which she gives me some reference in a policy book saying that any changes must be requested and wanted me to change her name from Mrs. Yellow Dragon Lady to just Dragon Lady. The the odd thing happens and I start IMing Yellow as well. From what I recall, he was questioning why I changed the Dragon Lady's last name and seemed to think I was trying to flirt with her, or something of that nature. After a few minutes I managed to convince him that I was a man of honor and wouldn't dare flirt with a guys wife. (unless we happen to be innocently mocking him in combined effort, poor poor Sethicus.)
So we start talking about code, Dragon Lady keeps IMing me to find out I found her in the program, and then all of a sudden Yellow challenges me to a duel, exclaiming that I am lower than the dust of the earth and summoning the elements to eradicate my very existence. I mean it was super weird, he even said that even the mighty rivalry between bismark and Hobbes would be small in comparison.
And then I woke up.
Here I was on a computer, either at home or at work and I started IMing Dragon Lady saying I changed her last name on the program that my team administers, to which she gives me some reference in a policy book saying that any changes must be requested and wanted me to change her name from Mrs. Yellow Dragon Lady to just Dragon Lady. The the odd thing happens and I start IMing Yellow as well. From what I recall, he was questioning why I changed the Dragon Lady's last name and seemed to think I was trying to flirt with her, or something of that nature. After a few minutes I managed to convince him that I was a man of honor and wouldn't dare flirt with a guys wife. (unless we happen to be innocently mocking him in combined effort, poor poor Sethicus.)
So we start talking about code, Dragon Lady keeps IMing me to find out I found her in the program, and then all of a sudden Yellow challenges me to a duel, exclaiming that I am lower than the dust of the earth and summoning the elements to eradicate my very existence. I mean it was super weird, he even said that even the mighty rivalry between bismark and Hobbes would be small in comparison.
And then I woke up.
Labels:
Dreams
Thursday, July 17, 2008
The wheel or the the elevator.
There is a new invention that is designed to get those little hamster hearts racing. The Lego Hamster Elevator. The only thing that gets their little hearts racing might be the fear. But it is neat little video, so have at it.
What you want to see
So I have had this blog for a month or so, thus far I have heard from a select few, and I was wondering what you all wanted to read about. Spiritual stuff, funny antics like Marriage, True Love, as if post, daily thoughts, thoughts on the news, conspiracy theories, weekly diss myself entries, super awkward posts attempting to weird everyone out, book reviews, etc. The sky is the limit. So submit ideas that you would like to read about.
It'll be like voting on Dancing with the Stars or whatever, but not.
Also, being the socially out of it young man, how soon in advance should a guy call some friends up to go hang out or whatever? Input greatly appreciated.
It'll be like voting on Dancing with the Stars or whatever, but not.
Also, being the socially out of it young man, how soon in advance should a guy call some friends up to go hang out or whatever? Input greatly appreciated.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Tagged, I'm it!
I have been tagged, so here it comes. Also it is still Chilly's day!!
Attached or Single: A fairly obvious answer; attached. After all, the knee bone is connected the thigh bone. And I am fairly certain that my head is somewhat attached to my shoulders... wait, what's that you say? Oh, relationship status you say? I happen to be single. The universe gets thrown out of whack when I am not single.
Best Friends: Alan! The Giant! Wally! Rigby (I need to show him my blog) Sethicus!
Cake or Pie: Cake. I follow the edict of that one queen who said let them eat cake. Unless it is ice cream pie.
Day of Choice: I like Tuesdays because I get to fence, Sunday is church, Thursdays and Fridays I test the limits of my dancing abilities Salsa dancing, or I waste time with friends in Salt Lake. So I am not sure.
Essential Items: My Glasses and contacts, My watch (I still hold my high school title of the Time King), my computer, phone.
Favorite Color: Red, blue and sometimes green. I think I described the Mexican flag
Gummy Bears or Worms: They're all the same to me.
Hometown: Born in Salt Lake, raised in Kearns and transfered to Stansbury Park, Tooele for two months(I have lived in all my mission areas longer than I have lived in Tooele) and now I live in Provo.
Indulgences: Facebook, reading too much, the 100 hour board. Computer Games
January or July: January. I like the snow!
Kids: They exist in the future
Like or Love: Love most definitely. Like isn't strong, isn't firm. It can be wishy washy as a high school crush. But like also precedes love, taking the small attraction to friendship, to knowing their likes, their dislikes, what makes them smile, what makes them laugh, willing to defend them and do anything for them, and willing to ignore every little flaw and look at the brilliance, and enjoy living every day with that person for all eternity.
Marriage Date: Inconceivable!
Number of Siblings: I am the oldest of two brothers, and two sisters. Jospeh, Sara, Alex and Azilee.
Phobias/Fears: Not achieving my potential, missing opportunities because of my own stubbornness, not following the whispers of the Holy Ghost or following through on revelation.
Quotes:
Reason to smile: Making someone else smile, mountain landscapes, looking deep into someone's eyes. Defeating Wally,
Season: Winter for all the snow, seeing it everywhere. And Summer to feel the warmth of the sun and be able to do all the outdoorsy things.
Unknown fact about me: I say weird things in my sleep. I also crashed the family van into the corner of the house before I got my license.
Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals: I eat meat and vegetables. But I do eat a lot of meat. So yes, I oppress animals of their right to live. In my mouth.
X-Rays or Ultrasounds: I sincerely hope I will never need an ultrasound. It'd just be too weird to explain.
Your Favorite Food: Spicy Mexican food.
Zodiac: I just so happen to be Taurus. I was also born in the year of the tiger if that helps.
Tag: Bob, Alan, the Giant, and Wally.
Yes Wally. I tagged you knowing you don't have a blog yet. I claim the victory!
Attached or Single: A fairly obvious answer; attached. After all, the knee bone is connected the thigh bone. And I am fairly certain that my head is somewhat attached to my shoulders... wait, what's that you say? Oh, relationship status you say? I happen to be single. The universe gets thrown out of whack when I am not single.
Best Friends: Alan! The Giant! Wally! Rigby (I need to show him my blog) Sethicus!
Cake or Pie: Cake. I follow the edict of that one queen who said let them eat cake. Unless it is ice cream pie.
Day of Choice: I like Tuesdays because I get to fence, Sunday is church, Thursdays and Fridays I test the limits of my dancing abilities Salsa dancing, or I waste time with friends in Salt Lake. So I am not sure.
Essential Items: My Glasses and contacts, My watch (I still hold my high school title of the Time King), my computer, phone.
Favorite Color: Red, blue and sometimes green. I think I described the Mexican flag
Gummy Bears or Worms: They're all the same to me.
Hometown: Born in Salt Lake, raised in Kearns and transfered to Stansbury Park, Tooele for two months(I have lived in all my mission areas longer than I have lived in Tooele) and now I live in Provo.
Indulgences: Facebook, reading too much, the 100 hour board. Computer Games
January or July: January. I like the snow!
Kids: They exist in the future
Like or Love: Love most definitely. Like isn't strong, isn't firm. It can be wishy washy as a high school crush. But like also precedes love, taking the small attraction to friendship, to knowing their likes, their dislikes, what makes them smile, what makes them laugh, willing to defend them and do anything for them, and willing to ignore every little flaw and look at the brilliance, and enjoy living every day with that person for all eternity.
Marriage Date: Inconceivable!
Number of Siblings: I am the oldest of two brothers, and two sisters. Jospeh, Sara, Alex and Azilee.
Phobias/Fears: Not achieving my potential, missing opportunities because of my own stubbornness, not following the whispers of the Holy Ghost or following through on revelation.
Quotes:
The average runner sprints until the breath in him is gone;
but the champion has the iron will that makes him carry on.
For rest, the average runner begs when limp his muscles grow
but the champion runs on leaden legs, his spirit makes him go.
The average man's complacent when he does his best to score,
but the champion does his best and then-he does a little more. - Author Unknown
Reason to smile: Making someone else smile, mountain landscapes, looking deep into someone's eyes. Defeating Wally,
Season: Winter for all the snow, seeing it everywhere. And Summer to feel the warmth of the sun and be able to do all the outdoorsy things.
Unknown fact about me: I say weird things in my sleep. I also crashed the family van into the corner of the house before I got my license.
Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals: I eat meat and vegetables. But I do eat a lot of meat. So yes, I oppress animals of their right to live. In my mouth.
X-Rays or Ultrasounds: I sincerely hope I will never need an ultrasound. It'd just be too weird to explain.
Your Favorite Food: Spicy Mexican food.
Zodiac: I just so happen to be Taurus. I was also born in the year of the tiger if that helps.
Tag: Bob, Alan, the Giant, and Wally.
Yes Wally. I tagged you knowing you don't have a blog yet. I claim the victory!
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Chilly's Day
Today is Chilly's day, because for undiscloseable reasons, her chi has been lost.
So this day, and every day until she has recovered, is Chilly's day.
So lets take this time to remember her, and pray that the apocalypse is not broguth about by her broken spririt.
Hip hip hurray!
Hip hip Hurray!
Hip hip Hurray!
Go Chilly! This is your day.
So this day, and every day until she has recovered, is Chilly's day.
So lets take this time to remember her, and pray that the apocalypse is not broguth about by her broken spririt.
Hip hip hurray!
Hip hip Hurray!
Hip hip Hurray!
Go Chilly! This is your day.
Labels:
Friends
Monday, July 14, 2008
Marriage, True love, as if.
The past two days I have not been myself. I'd been, well emotionally cut off from the world. Not caring at all really. Anyways, I am back, there is no need to fear... Well there is plenty of reason to fear, mainly because I am back.
Now you're probably wondering what this has to do with the title. First off, nothing at all. Second, I can't do the accents right from Princess Bride, so that little humor has been eliminated. Alas, such is life.
But why talk of something so strange, so abhorrent as marriage? I mean it is not as if I am dating anyone or am involved with anyone, or will be anytime soon. But sadly those arguments fail against the insistence of Wally. At first I assumed his mind had gone mad, after all, he refuses to date the enemy, which to him just so happens to be all females. But something was amiss, something that I could not place my finger on, and could not merely assume it to be the teasings of an old friend. But tonight my dear readers, I learned the truth, I learned of his deceitful plan. Most would deem it too harrowing to tell, but I must. You see, he plans to use the distractions of the wedding reception to take objects of every day value and use them *shudder* to graffiti the Tin Can Mobile, my car, with marriage decor. Do you not see his dastardly plan? And as more time passes, the more preparation he has, and so I have not a moment to lose, because the Tin Can Mobile's integrity must be preserved I say! It must!
Yes, I know what you're all thinking, just wait a few years to get married, and Wally will have forgotten about the threat. But that is what he wants us to think, that will give him more preparation; considering he will be a computer/mechanical engineer of great talent in the near future.
So how do I propose to win you say? By beating him at his own game, and getting married before December!* That is the only way, but I need avictim lady to agree... I first conferred with the Giant, but unfortunately I doubt that Lilian, the great Rocket Scientist, would be able to find time in her hectic schedule to aid me against the malevolent Wally, and lets just say that such a proposition made to Lilian's sister got her running in the opposite direction, clutching her stomach.
But, as I sit here and meditate on who who could aid me, I realize the qualities that I will need from my partner: the need for secrecy, hidden talents, a deadly smile, a mighty wit, and the most exuberant sense of humor (needed by you reading too, that's right, YOU) that the world has ever known. An army of younger siblings is appealing as well. So as I pondered on the possibilities, only one person came to mind, only one person could help me defeat Wally the Third through the bonds of holy matrimony.
Who is it? Bob. That is right, you heard me. Bob.
And so I ask you dearest Bob, will you come to my aid against the vile Wally; whose evilness is just a blip on the spectrum of vilehood, whose mischievousness is entrenched in all would be friends of the groom and whose threat is only paralleled by the mighty ladybug on a fresh spring morning.
And so I ask; Bob, Will you marry me?
I mean, it worked for the Scarlet Pimpernel when he fought the French right? Surely it could happen again.
*DISCLAIMER: The author of this blog claims no responsibility for those who read this entry as literal. Those who read this entry literally will be in danger of being handed over to a pack of Norwegian Ridgebacks for failure to recognize the intended humor of said entry. The author also does not confirm if being up at such a late hour has affected his reasoning, but it is the most probable. Although, the author also admits that if there is a female concerned with victory against the foul Wally, such help will not be denied, so long as said female states an oath acknowledges that she understands the humor in this entry, and also recognizes that there is no love in the authors heart for her. Only laughter. That will lead to another asthma attack someday. But yes, much laughter is all that is in the author's heart. Except for blood. And white blood cells. And maybe something else. Or the author is really a cyborg in disguise. And maybe the author should have headed to bed by now. He is clearly insane, you might want to commit him before it is too late. No? Well don't blame me when the author plots with two lab mice to take over the world, I'm just the disclaimer. I mean, it's not like anyone listens to me. Seventh graders just throw me away without properly looking at me on the first day of school...
Now you're probably wondering what this has to do with the title. First off, nothing at all. Second, I can't do the accents right from Princess Bride, so that little humor has been eliminated. Alas, such is life.
But why talk of something so strange, so abhorrent as marriage? I mean it is not as if I am dating anyone or am involved with anyone, or will be anytime soon. But sadly those arguments fail against the insistence of Wally. At first I assumed his mind had gone mad, after all, he refuses to date the enemy, which to him just so happens to be all females. But something was amiss, something that I could not place my finger on, and could not merely assume it to be the teasings of an old friend. But tonight my dear readers, I learned the truth, I learned of his deceitful plan. Most would deem it too harrowing to tell, but I must. You see, he plans to use the distractions of the wedding reception to take objects of every day value and use them *shudder* to graffiti the Tin Can Mobile, my car, with marriage decor. Do you not see his dastardly plan? And as more time passes, the more preparation he has, and so I have not a moment to lose, because the Tin Can Mobile's integrity must be preserved I say! It must!
Yes, I know what you're all thinking, just wait a few years to get married, and Wally will have forgotten about the threat. But that is what he wants us to think, that will give him more preparation; considering he will be a computer/mechanical engineer of great talent in the near future.
So how do I propose to win you say? By beating him at his own game, and getting married before December!* That is the only way, but I need a
But, as I sit here and meditate on who who could aid me, I realize the qualities that I will need from my partner: the need for secrecy, hidden talents, a deadly smile, a mighty wit, and the most exuberant sense of humor (needed by you reading too, that's right, YOU) that the world has ever known. An army of younger siblings is appealing as well. So as I pondered on the possibilities, only one person came to mind, only one person could help me defeat Wally the Third through the bonds of holy matrimony.
Who is it? Bob. That is right, you heard me. Bob.
And so I ask you dearest Bob, will you come to my aid against the vile Wally; whose evilness is just a blip on the spectrum of vilehood, whose mischievousness is entrenched in all would be friends of the groom and whose threat is only paralleled by the mighty ladybug on a fresh spring morning.
And so I ask; Bob, Will you marry me?
I mean, it worked for the Scarlet Pimpernel when he fought the French right? Surely it could happen again.
*DISCLAIMER: The author of this blog claims no responsibility for those who read this entry as literal. Those who read this entry literally will be in danger of being handed over to a pack of Norwegian Ridgebacks for failure to recognize the intended humor of said entry. The author also does not confirm if being up at such a late hour has affected his reasoning, but it is the most probable. Although, the author also admits that if there is a female concerned with victory against the foul Wally, such help will not be denied, so long as said female states an oath acknowledges that she understands the humor in this entry, and also recognizes that there is no love in the authors heart for her. Only laughter. That will lead to another asthma attack someday. But yes, much laughter is all that is in the author's heart. Except for blood. And white blood cells. And maybe something else. Or the author is really a cyborg in disguise. And maybe the author should have headed to bed by now. He is clearly insane, you might want to commit him before it is too late. No? Well don't blame me when the author plots with two lab mice to take over the world, I'm just the disclaimer. I mean, it's not like anyone listens to me. Seventh graders just throw me away without properly looking at me on the first day of school...
Labels:
Girls,
Humor,
Marriage Jokes,
My Writings,
Random
Thursday, July 10, 2008
I don't know what to name this actually.
Well first off, it as been three, maybe four days, since I put the little counter at the bottom of the page. I know you all don't like to scroll down there, but it's there, trust me. What boggles me, is that this site has been visited near to 40 times since I got this. I know it isn't all me either, so I am just wondering who is refreshing the page over and over, because I know I am not that likeable, or funny enough (Shush Giovanni, your rantings about me being funny don't help me here. ;) ) to have that many people view the page.
Or maybe it is just search engine robots passing by.
In other news, Questionable Content is amazingly funny. I know I have converted Green Giant and Yellow M&M to its pages, it just needs more. More I tell you! MORE!!!!!
The world must be filled with laughter!!!
In other related news, there is a non existent study that has just been released showing that guys who go by Nanti-SARRMM go insane in the late hours of the night, especially when blogging. He was last heard shouting into the streets that he would conquer Stronbadia with the Homestramy first, and then the world. He also gave a random old homeless person a heart attack by leaping out of the shadows shouting Kni.
The world will cease to believe the mad claims that a return to normalcy is good, or that it is supposed to be a historic symbol of some sort.
We can only hope that he hasn't turned into an avatar of pure evil bent on destroying the world and is only attempting an attempt at humor. On the Internet. Oh will the madness ever cease?
Last thoughts: Bluetooth and broadcasting dreams through it.
Or maybe it is just search engine robots passing by.
In other news, Questionable Content is amazingly funny. I know I have converted Green Giant and Yellow M&M to its pages, it just needs more. More I tell you! MORE!!!!!
The world must be filled with laughter!!!
In other related news, there is a non existent study that has just been released showing that guys who go by Nanti-SARRMM go insane in the late hours of the night, especially when blogging. He was last heard shouting into the streets that he would conquer Stronbadia with the Homestramy first, and then the world. He also gave a random old homeless person a heart attack by leaping out of the shadows shouting Kni.
The world will cease to believe the mad claims that a return to normalcy is good, or that it is supposed to be a historic symbol of some sort.
We can only hope that he hasn't turned into an avatar of pure evil bent on destroying the world and is only attempting an attempt at humor. On the Internet. Oh will the madness ever cease?
Last thoughts: Bluetooth and broadcasting dreams through it.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Turning the wierdness up a notch
In attempts to break the awkward or weirdness level with a girl in my ward, it seems I have only made the ice thicker.
You see, I moved into this singles ward two months after I came off the mission, so naturally there was bound to be some weirdness and awkwardness. With a certain set of girls, this has continued. It may be attributed to the fact that at one of the first times at ward prayer I told Melinda (Names changed of course) that she laughed like Gollum, meaning it as a compliment. Combined with being a tad socially awkward and shy, there is a perpetual barrier of awkwardness whenever we're together at stuff like FHE, and we've never really had an actual conversation besides saying what is up and briefly chatting through facebook.
So tonight, I get home and see her online on facebook and I decided it would be a great way to break through that barrier, maybe get Melinda's sister, Nancy, to chuckle a bit. To say the least, I failed, utterly. For your laughing pleasure, here is the transcript:
Sam
Nice love in the family, what with your sister liking a photo because she thinks you look like a guy. :)
10:49pm Nancy
wow do you really read everything on everyones profile?
10:51pm Sam
yes, obviously I use every minute of my time to read new things in facebook profiles,(please note that this is supposed to be sarcasm here!!!!) or it just happens to appear at the top of the news feed
10:51pm Nancy
yeah, seems like it
10:53pm Sam
hmmn, I had not realized that I have the aura of a facebook stalker. I guess my work is succeeding in keeping up the level of awkwardness though.
10:53pm Nancy
its not awkward. its weird
10:55pm Sam
Well I do apologize for being weird. I shall punish myself by saying Kni at myself in front of a mirror.
10:56pm Nancy
ok that's even weirder. i think you need some sleep. goodnight Sam!
10:57pm Sam
Hmmn, how unfortunate that the humor of Monty Python is not grasped.
10:57pm Nancy
yes, quite unfortunate.
10:57pm Sam
So what do you find funny?
10:58pm Nancy
nothing. i'm going to bed. goodnight
10:59pm Sam
how unfortunate, I guess my plans to conquer the world by giving them asthma through laughter have failed. I shall have to consult with Pinky to formulate a new plan
but goodnight.
So, although at the time it was slightly humorous for me, I failed. One can only wonder how church will be on Sunday.
You see, I moved into this singles ward two months after I came off the mission, so naturally there was bound to be some weirdness and awkwardness. With a certain set of girls, this has continued. It may be attributed to the fact that at one of the first times at ward prayer I told Melinda (Names changed of course) that she laughed like Gollum, meaning it as a compliment. Combined with being a tad socially awkward and shy, there is a perpetual barrier of awkwardness whenever we're together at stuff like FHE, and we've never really had an actual conversation besides saying what is up and briefly chatting through facebook.
So tonight, I get home and see her online on facebook and I decided it would be a great way to break through that barrier, maybe get Melinda's sister, Nancy, to chuckle a bit. To say the least, I failed, utterly. For your laughing pleasure, here is the transcript:
Sam
Nice love in the family, what with your sister liking a photo because she thinks you look like a guy. :)
10:49pm Nancy
wow do you really read everything on everyones profile?
10:51pm Sam
yes, obviously I use every minute of my time to read new things in facebook profiles,(please note that this is supposed to be sarcasm here!!!!) or it just happens to appear at the top of the news feed
10:51pm Nancy
yeah, seems like it
10:53pm Sam
hmmn, I had not realized that I have the aura of a facebook stalker. I guess my work is succeeding in keeping up the level of awkwardness though.
10:53pm Nancy
its not awkward. its weird
10:55pm Sam
Well I do apologize for being weird. I shall punish myself by saying Kni at myself in front of a mirror.
10:56pm Nancy
ok that's even weirder. i think you need some sleep. goodnight Sam!
10:57pm Sam
Hmmn, how unfortunate that the humor of Monty Python is not grasped.
10:57pm Nancy
yes, quite unfortunate.
10:57pm Sam
So what do you find funny?
10:58pm Nancy
nothing. i'm going to bed. goodnight
10:59pm Sam
how unfortunate, I guess my plans to conquer the world by giving them asthma through laughter have failed. I shall have to consult with Pinky to formulate a new plan
but goodnight.
So, although at the time it was slightly humorous for me, I failed. One can only wonder how church will be on Sunday.
Monday, July 7, 2008
The calling
My brother has received his mission call to the Chicago Illinois South Mission. He enters the MTC on September 10th. That is all.
Labels:
Family,
Missionary
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