The Sutherland Insitute, Asexualism, and You.

With the two Salt Lake ordinances that passed this week granting work protection rights to gays, and with the LDS/Mormon Church backing them, you think all would be happy in Utah, right? Not so, one group, the Sutherland Group, disagrees. Upon hearing their representative talk, you'd think they're speaking out against gay rights equality.

Not so. If look into the bad grammar and oddly placed logic, you'll see that they're suggesting something else entirely:

Sexual orientation is an illusion. Your idea of rights is an illusion. Your equality is illusory.

"Sexual orientation is an illusion". Apparently the Sutherland institute believes we're all supposed to be asexual. This is further apparent by their statement,

It only exists in the minds of activists, and their academics, who need to explain away why people do what they do even when they don't want to do it.

So, according to Paul Mero of the Sutherland Institute, he has no sexual orientation and believes that there should be no sexual orientation at all. He's either a cyborg with robotic manly bits, or he's completely asexual. Although the more logical answer would be that he's a cyborg, his states,

The truth is that we are born male and female with moral agency.

See! He says we're all born male AND female. Not 'Male or Female', but 'and'. Clearly that means he is arguing that only asexual humans have rights.

Of course, it doesn't help that he contradicts his asexual argument by saying,

Because it's behavior, our sexuality is always a choice, and any other sexual construct is an illusion.

Of course he could just be saying that heterosexuality and homosexuality are both illusions. That's probably it. He thinks everyone who isn't asexual is actually holographically projecting their sexual behavior, since they aren't asexual.

And, as a follow-up Mero said,

Your idea of rights is an illusion. With the backing of every miserable misanthropic philosopher of the post-Enlightenment era, your initiative feeds on the unreasonable notion that you have these magically organic rights to do whatever you desire.

Clearly the only explanation is that Mero is Morpheus, an asexual cybernetic humanoid who is subtly informing us of the Matrix that we live in, and that we're all an illusion because we aren't asexual. It has nothing to do with his views on homosexuality or that a gay person could view heterosexuality as an illusion, it's that we're all battery-like slaves and he wants to set us free.

I think we should listen to the man, cause I can't wait to asexually split with myself.