If I Had a Band, This Might be What It'd be Called.

I saw this on Facebook and I thought I'd try it.



1 - Go to Wikipedia to view a random article.
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to Quotations Page and select "random quotations"
The last four or five words of the very last quote on the page is the title of your first album.
This is where my quote came from. (You can click on the quote to go to the page

3 - Go to Flickr and click on “explore the last seven days”
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.
My album photo courtesy of Turin

4 - Use Photoshop or something similar to put it all together.

5 - Now tag whoever you wish, like anyone who reads this before Sunday at 8:00 pm, to do the same.

Oddly enough, I think mine is slightly ironic.

Missionary Friday

Yet another letter from Elder Field's travels and adventures in the Chicago South Mission. Disclaimer: Any doctrinal idea posted in this letter is not necessarily the belief of this blog's owner and the owner claims no responsibility for the contents of the letter if proven to be doctrinally incorrect.

Hey Ya'll,
To start, last P-day was for the most part one of the better P-days of my mission. We had an all day district activity that started with us going over to Sister C.'s home to discuss some deep doctrine. She really knows her stuff, she knows people very well also, she understands stuff that nobody else does and I think she may have the gift of discernment. I learned a lot from our little discussion with her. Here's a small sample of some of the stuff I learned from her. She and Elder K. apprently both died once; though he never went through the tunnel, she did and he wanted to know what that was like. She said that the feeling of death was like a cold sheet being pulled over you on a hot winter's night and when you look through the sheet at your body, you're repulsed. When you see the tunnel, you are more than happy to go through in most cases. When you get to the other side, you are greeted first by those who have gone before you. One woman on the other side asked her about her father and what he was like now, Sister C. said, and when she got back she talked to her father and she saw a picture of his mom who had died in child birth and never knew her son. She said that was the woman from the other side. After that, she said you don't go up to St. Peter at a big golden gate as is always depicted in the movies, but the real thing is quite dull and nothing special at all. It's just some random guy at a desk in front of a door who doesn't know you at all. he asks you who you are and how you died, if your name is not in the book he will usually tell you as he did to her that it's not your time and sends you back to your body. This was her experience, I'm not sure if that's what everyone goes through or if it was just her own experience but now you know a little bit more about what it could actually be like.
Next on thee list of unofficial doctrine, Sister C. thinks that Adam and Eve could have resisted temptation and that if they had, that was God's plan all along and God would have eventually have let them eat the fruit anyway, but instead they are viewed as bad guys to the world. We all know we would still need the atonement either way though. I also learned what it means to have my calling and election made sure. I never really understood that until now. there was loads of other good stuff spoken about, but I don't want to fill this email with just that. She told us at the end to pray about it all before excepting any of it as truth, I leave that to you to do the same if you wish.
After visiting Sister C. we went to do email. I felt so terrible about everything that was said in the past weeks that it almost ruined the rest of my day, but this week I got some uplifting emails that made me feel better about everything that was said before in my e-mails.
After sending email we took the metro (we know from experience that it is impossible to find parking anywhere downtown) to the world famous Chicago auto show. It was such an awesome experience to be able to see all of next years models before they reached the market, and also last years classics that are no longer available. There were loads of amazing cars and features to behold. My favorite part was the Transformers exhibit. They had the stars of the second movie there. I loved Sideswipe, the stingray model; that car wont even be out next year. They had three other stars there and gave a sneak preview that we were told would only be gotten here. In Transformer's: Revenge of the Fallen, its up to Bumblebee, Sideswipe, and the three other young Transformers to save the day when Megatron returns with a Vengeance. The movie comes out in June by the way and although I am excited for it but woes of me, I am also sad because I will have to wait an additional 15 months to see it. Oh well, just have to keep my mind on the work and I will be watching that movie in no time. After the car show was the best part of the day. While we were waiting for the metro to take us back home we did some street contacts with those who were also waiting. I must have taught at least three lessons with commitments included, that's about as much as a normal day and on a P-day that's unheard of. Enough about P-day though, you probably want to hear about the rest of my week.
Last Thursday and Friday were more of the same and more of it. Our trio is so much more dedicated than my last companionship and we are being rewarded, we were overbooked this week with both member and nonmember appointments, we are getting fed lots more and are even having to reschedule some appointments due to overbooking. Saturday I taught a woman and she told me I spoke with spirit and zeal and loved to hear from me! Talk about an ego booster that's a very big compliment! Monday we were able to recontact an old lost investigator, a media referral Elder C. and I found. We lost her for a time but now she's back and wants to be baptized. We are getting more and more baptism dates and I know that this one, unlike some others I have less confidence in but still hope for, will be baptized.
After a week like this i really cant be down on myself, I realize that I am doing just as much work as my companions are and the fruits of our labors are split evenly between us. I am doing just as good a job as they are and I really don't need to worry about feelings of inadequacy. My hard work is finally paying off. I just hope that the baptism dates go through this transfer or through the first part of next because I'm about 99% sure I will be leaving.
That's about it for this installment of Fields mission emails. Tune in next week for another exiting episode.

Sincerely,
Elder Fields

Totally Unexpected

I just got the most awesome verification word. I thought I'd share it with you.

Faces, and the No Pants Dance

I believe this can speak for itself.


Sorry to all those who can't access youtube.

Would You Let Me Control the World for a Klondike Bar?

The other day a friend of mine had as his status in facebook as "Would you take over the world for a Klondike bar?" and it got me thinking how Klondike bars could be key to global domination.

Think about it, all the commercials for the delicious bar have the person doing something extreme just to get one Klondike Bar, which sets a precedent of behavior to conquer the world.

First off the person who enacts this plan has to have majority control over Klondike to up production, and at the same time limit sales, so only few Klondikes that are made are sent throughout the world. Or the person would need enough money to buy almost all the Klondike Bars that are made to increase their value, and will cause demand to go up.

So for example in the United States there would be few Klondike bars sold to make them seem rare to buy, while at the same time send truckloads to countries that don't know what a Klondike Bar is, with the same advertising as in the United States and once Klondikes are common there, decrease sales there increase worth as in the USA.

So for those countries that now view the Klondike as rare and in high demand, set up Klondike parties throughout those countries, like a day at the fair or something, and give out Klondikes if the person will sign a legally binding but seemingly harmless document stating that they approve that me, or whoever decides to enact this plan, as being a global leader.

So thought this plan will take a while to go into fruition, eventually you should have nearly 6 billion signatures, all legally binding, from most, if not all, countries in the world, giving you permission to control the world. And all for a Klondike bar.

So if you start noticing a deficit in Klondike Bars... well, don't sign anything hastily, unless of course I'm telling you to.

And Now We Know...

A Needed Warning

The FDA/FCC or whichever government agency monitors information might get after me if I don't publish this warning so all can be forewarned:

Based off the following words: missionary (14x) dead (3x) and death (1x)

So I thought I would warn you so you can properly avoiding sullying yourself with all the filth and unmoral things that you will find here.

A Break

The regularly scheduled blogging schedule has been interrupted by a vicious activity called "School Work".

Scientists are unable to determine when it will end and can only hope that the lack of blog posts does not adversely affect the climate, while other postulate that congress might be petitioned for a bailout of some unknown amount.

No answers can be offered at this time, except unless asked in the form of linear algebraic matrix problems.

Missionary Wednesday

Dear family and the rest of you all,

I apologize for making light of the things that I said, some of you sent e-mails expressing concern for some previous content in my last e-mails. I did not mean to do anything other then share my experiences. All I intended to do was share some fun stories but now I see that there is more to it then that. I cannot apologize enough for all the worry and grief that I have caused you all. As far as I was concerned I was only having a bit of fun. As far as that stuff about keeping my heart locked, it should be easy considering that it was locked for 20 years before my mission. I was a bit confused before about that, someone told me to open my heart before my mission, I now understand that they meant to open it in a different way then the way that I am supposed to keep it locked while out here. I have more thoughts on this and other subjects but I don't want to go in depth about them because I now know what happens when I do that and I should be moving on to actual events this week rather than continuing my endless apologies. I really meant it to be just filler and fun stories and I am sorry for making you feel otherwise. I wont do that again even if I have a week where i have absolutely nothing else to say.

It turns out that Elder H and Elder B are as dedicated to the work as they are to cleaning. Thursday we continued to do as Elder C and I had done for the last four months and nothing special really happened. Friday would be bad luck to some but for us it was good luck. We taught a baptist man with a family of ten kids and he wants us to come back so his whole family can hear our message. We got him to agree to a baptism date and they were so exited to get that far with him. I on the other hand am not. Elder C and I got baptism dates but those mean nothing if you don't keep regular contact with the people and if those people aren't keeping there commitments. I would be more thrilled if they did that. After that we followed up on old media referrals who have already had there items delivered on our way to one of those we met to teenagers named P and J. Like most others around here they thought we were either police or Jehovah's Witnesses. They asked what kind of pamphlets we were handing out, and we told them were were giving away free bibles and that we weren't Jehovah's Witnesses. Once they knew who we were thew were a bit more friendly towards us. We invited them to Saturday morning basketball and they were more then happy to come. Unfortunately because of there previous experiences with pushy and rude Jehovah's Witnesses, we didn't teach them much. Both Elder H and Elder B were to afraid that by teaching we would push them away and it would be better to just let them come to us. I've heard this sad story before and although these two boys may get baptized one day i regrettably wont be around this area long enough to see that happen.

Saturday was Valentines, but an ordinary day to a missionary with no significant other, no loving for my kind that's all I'll say about that. I did have fun story involving the sisters that doesn't have anything to do with valentines day. It has to do with a scripture chase but due to getting chewed out multiple times now and knowing what I know now I think I will take an alternate route and work on the problem I seem to have about keeping my big mouth shut. After basketball we dropped off P and J near where they live. I didn't like that because picking up and dropping off makes you a taxi service and without you, those who are dependent on you for rides disappear when you get transferred. Next we proceeded with missionary work. Later we attended a triple baptism. Unfortunately all the baptisms I have attended in this area have been in Pullman's area. I hope I don't turn out to be like Elder C and have all my areas fire up right after I leave and through no work of my own. My companions have already done far more work then I could have done and I really don't feel like any of the baptisme we get while I am still here will actually be because of anything that I have said or done. I will have been here 6 months after this transfer and I know that I will be leaving at the end of this transfer. I feel like all the hard work that I have done in this area will be for nothing. All the investigators Elder C and I had are either hopeless or have disappeared off the face of the planet, all our new investigators have been found through their efforts and not mine. I don't feel that I have really done anything at all. I really hope this changes soon and hopefully it will. I figured out why Elder C and I didn't accomplish much; he had much works but no faith and thus like the reverse our works were dead. On the other hand this companionship of three has loads of both and will make a large impact on this area. I just hope I can be a bigger part of it and be here to see the fruits of our labor.

Sunday previous to now has usually been a take it easy day, but not any more. We worked just as hard Sunday as every other day and got one more baptism date set. Again, I will be more thrilled when they keep their commitments. Monday and Tuesday were more of the same, but Tuesday we got a third baptism set with someone Elder C and I had actually contacted. Before we had gotten into their home and spoke with them but we were not able to teach. This time we got in and were able to teach. I have more hope for this one because she actually knew me and I taught more. If this baptism goal goes through, I will be so much more thrilled because I know I have actually accomplished something and I know it will actually be mine.

All caught up for this week; again I apologize for the trouble that I caused and wish you all well.

love Elder Fields.

What I like...

Well bismark did this on his blog, so I thought I would post mine.

1. Uncle Sam likes to publish...
2. Sam likes to draw and make executive decisions about things such as shirt sizes, salaries...
3. Sam likes to discover things himself, and finds it's much more fun than letting things that are need of promotion discover him.
4. Fun is the game that Sam likes to play.
5. Sam likes to spend most of his time outside of city hall.
6. Sam likes to stay politically active and believes that his political outlook is reflected in his attitude towards the music business.
7. Sam likes to giggle. (And laugh until his face turns purple, but that's not told there.)
8. Sam likes to spend time with his girls, fish, play just about every sport imaginable, and dabble in video games.
9. Sam likes to share a table with other friends for a one-of-a-kind "Chef's Table" dinner.
10. Sam likes to write Articles, take Notes, follow Links, Quote people, take nice Photos and Rant.

using my real name, I get these results:

1. Sam likes to dance.
2. Sam likes to read.
3. Sam likes to watch.
4. Sam likes to be active outside the classroom and laboratory.
5. Sam likes to meet with the bride and/or groom prior to the service.
6. Sam likes to say 'Yes' and then see if we can do it.
7. Sam likes to “scratch” records as a deejay.
8. Sam likes to exercise at the gym during off hours and is trying to improve skill in order to get ahead professionally.
9. Sam likes to laugh at those who think ebonics is a real language.
10. Sam likes to know what his friends are up to.

What do you like to do?

Shouldn't I Be Having Bad Luck?

It's Friday the 13th, you'd think I'd have bad luck or something. Of course there is the fact that I really don't believe that sort of thing except for the laughs, so that may have something to do with it.

But, even so, as I promised, I'll link some random history facts that I am learning in my class.

Such as in Brazil in the 1500's, African slaves were arriving at a 3:1 rate to Portuguese, and so that influenced their society. And if I recall from the textbook (I don't have it or my notes in front of me at the moment) many slaves rebelled and formed a large settlement that took 80 or so years to correct. I'll look in my text book and notes to provide more information.

And then there are the poor 117 settlers or so that came to America under Sir Walter Raleigh. They settled on Roanoke Island, and when Raleigh came back in two years, due to the war with the Spanish Armada, there was hardly any trace of them.
I was going to make a joke about how they could have been lifted up like the people of Enoch, but then I read some stuff about how some of them intermarried with some natives and mingled with them... so that joke's dead. Oh well.

Have fun you all!

Double Missionary Wednesday

Well last week Elder Fields wrote a letter and it arrived today, and he sent an e-mail as well, so we have two letters in one post.

Dear Family and Friends,

Again the powers that be did not allow me to use email this week. So it is snail mail gain and I am getting tired of it.

This week was the last week of the transfer and everyone in the district has been ramped up the max, it's almost unbearable. Fortunately, I knew it was just because it is the last week of transfers and they love to give me a hard time especially Elder V, because he is going home, even with the district, we still had loads of good times, especially with Sister Ca,and Sister B.

This last week has not been very eventful between last Wednesday and Sunday. Nothing worth mentioning really happened, especially in regards to mission work. There are no stories this week. Everything good/worth mentioning happened between Monday and now. So brace yourselves for the rest of this letter.

Monday night was very weird. My companion was leading me on to believe that I have gone on my first date ever. I'm not sure though, so please read on. At 5 pm Monday nigh, E. C and I walked in to take a rest as We are not allowed to proselyte after dark unless we have a set appointment. We did have a dinner appointment at 6:30 pm but nothing else that night. It was getting dark so I decide to take a nap until we had to leave for our dinner appointment. While I was napping, Elder C was doing his own thing. He got a call from our dinner appointment and it was changed to 7:30 PM. Then he got another call from the sisters and they told him their appointment had canceled. Apparently that is unheard of for sister missionaries, but they get no sympathy from me because Elders' appointments get canceled all the time. Each of the sister missionaries said it was the others' idea and asked Elder C if they would like to get ice cream at McDonalds. Elder C agreed and told them he would see them there at 6 pm. When the time rolled around Elder C woke me up for what I assumed was our dinner appointment. We ended up going to McDonalds and eating Mcflurries with the sister missionaries. Then other elders in the district came by and after the sisters left, they congratulated me for my first date and tried to convince me it was actually a date. Their logic is weird, but I don't think it was a date, nor think it's worth something to think about much.

Moving on to Tuesday. Tuesday was a very long day because we knew the transfer call was coming. Somehow we managed to get through the day and went to a member’s home. Sister M is a recent convert, her mom died recently and she has had to move into her old home and take care of some business. We gave her a blessing and for the first time on my mission I was the one who gave it. I had forgotten how amazing it is to do that but I hope to never forget again.

Tuesday night we got the transfer call. To my sweet relief I am staying in Beverly for one last transfer. I don’t have to worry going to Naperville for 6 more weeks. I am not worried, whatever happens happens. This transfer is the will of God, so I am okay with it. I started in Beverly in a companionship of 3 and that is how I’m finishing up. My new companions are Elder H and Elder B. They seem nice so far but let’s see what happens.

Elder C is leaving, after one difficult year of hard work and no fruits for the labor, he is getting rewarded by going to Berbinai. This is supposedly the promised land where baptisms fall into your lap. I think he has earned it. Then sister missionaries are staying, Elder V went home, so Elder K gets a new comp. Elber Kb got punished by being transferred to the stock yards in a companionship of three as well. We all had to laugh at that because we think he deserves it. This next 6 weeks should be interesting.

Wednesday, the entire District spent almost the whole day just hanging out together one last time. That last District was way tight even though they gave me a heck of time sometimes.

Thursday morning Elder C couldn't get up and out any faster. I was almost eager for him to leave as he was. He is a great guy but after 3 transfers together we were about ready to kill each other. The transfer meeting was short as usual but they needlessly spent hours socializing. It was too much time for me. Though it is good to be able to talk to people like that, they spend too many hours talking. That is time we could have spent getting a head start on the transfer. After everyone finally left we had lunch and then went home. We spent the rest of the day unpacking and getting to know each other better. Today we are deep cleaning the apartment. Something we could have been done yesterday. If we had more time today we could have done some missionary work.

I hope to bring this area to its knees and maybe even get a baptism this transfer. I will continue to fill you on mission life. Stay true to the gospel

Elder Fields.

And for the second letter...

Dear family and friends,

This week I am blessed to be able to use the university email again, so no snail mail this week. hopefully this will continue for the rest of the transfer.
after checking my email i see you got my massive 7 page epistle. Though it is in my handwritten letter, the short of the transfers is that I will be staying in Beverly for at least one transfer, then I think I will be leaving because it's virtually unheard of to stay in your first area for more than the time I'll be there, so if I go to Naperville at the end of this transfer, then so be it, I got my wish for this transfer.
Elder C went to the promised land of Berbinai and after a bad year of dead areas and no baptisms, he deserves it. This transfer I'm in another companionship of three. It's fitting because that's how I started in Beverly and that's how I may finish. after I leave the other two will take over so I wont have to worry about what is happening over here after I leave.

That about brings you up to speed on the more important details of my last letter, now on to other events. Elder H and Elder B both seem to have an odd obsession with cleaning. They spent the first five days of this transfer just in fixing up the apartment, making it more livable and settling in. Elder C worked very hard at cleaning the place up multiple times and continued to deep clean it a lot when he was there. These two make Elder C seem like a complete slob by comparison. They both say it was in terrible shape because of too many years of missionary neglect. They moved in and only think they will only be living there for a short time so really there is no point for them to clean up so much.

I was beginning to think that after doing nothing but the above for five days that was how we were going to be spending the entire transfer, but finally we got to the mission work on Tuesday. Even though it was pretty much the same thing Elder C and I have been doing for four months, I was exited to be getting back to the purpose of why we are out hear. If these two are as dedicated to mission work as they are to cleaning, then we should have a baptism in no time.

About my new companions; Elder H has been out for 15 months, he has 7 baptisms, loves the work and just got Dear John'd a few weeks ago. Bird has been out for 9 months, has 1 baptism(still one more then me)and his girlfriend is too young to be thinking about marriage. It's a safe bet that she will wait the full 2 years but there is still a small chance that she won't. Elder B also loves the work and that makes three of us. It's been said that those who get put in companionships of three will have that experience more then once, so I doubt that this will be my last time I am with two other elders.

Wow, this email was comparatively short than my last letter. I'm out of stuff to say already. I guess nothing has really happened since transfers. My lengthy epistles and the long email I sent to Sam should more than make up for any lack of detail in this one.

until next week
love Elder Fields

Awesome

I don't think any of you realize how awesome Katydid is. She rocks. She's not afraid to state her feelings, to do what is right and is as wise as the Dali Lama... Ok, not as wise, she still has a few things that she could teach him, but you get the idea. She's just super cool.


Also, beware the Sholf. More information will be forthcoming.

Revolutionary Family

Today I decided to do some family research, seeing as I haven't done some in a while, and found something cool.

I was following some genealogical line and I found that I am related to one Captain Samuel Bliss of the Revolutionary War.

To be more specific I am Timothy Bliss's 8th Great Grandson, who is Samuel Bliss's brother making him my 8th Great Grand Uncle.

According to this site here, Captain Samuel Bliss led 43 minute-men from April, 19 1775 to April 27th, for 8 days.

He was also a Captain under Col. Timothy Walker's Regiment in the latter part of 1775, he also served under Captain Slade and was General George Washington's steward in 1777 in Morristown.

I have to admit, this is pretty awesome, cooler than discovering my great grandfather died in the Civil War as a Confederate soldier.

I'll let you all know when I find someone else cool that I am related to, or something awesome that a family member did.

Also, my Aunt is a 17th generation descendant of Pocahontas, So through my Uncle's marriage to my Aunt, I am sort of related to her as well.

Make it Through

Well I finally have loads of music to do this meme, so lets have at it! (Yeah, it was done in October by others, but I didn't have tons of music at the time. Now I do)

1. Put Your iTunes, Windows Media Player, MP3 Player, or whatever on Shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write down the name of the song no matter how silly it sounds!
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.

If someone says, “Is this okay?” You say?
"Trogdor!" [Trogdor will get with you later, he is currently burninating the countryside]
(StrongBad/Matt Chapman)

How would you describe yourself?
"Prima Donna!" [Ha! I demand your adoration!]
(Andrew Llyod Weber/Phantom of the Opera)

What do you like in a guy/girl?
"A Bit of Earth From the Secret Garden" [I guess all natural and mysterious.]
(Jordan Bluth)

How do you feel today?
"The Portrait Gallery" [I knew it, I am just a two dimensional being. I should have wondered why I see this frame around me at all times.]
(John Williams/Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban)

What is your life’s purpose?
"Respect" [I'll show you some respect!]
(Kelly Clarkson/Ella Enchanted)

What is your motto?
"I See Dead People in Boats" [They're not a talkative lot either.]
(Hans Zimmer/Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End)

What do your friends think of you?
"The Treason of Isengard" [Well... I guess I'll go hide away in my indestructible fortress for the foreseeable future.]
(Lord of the Rings Trilogy)

What do you think of your parents?
"Death of Cedric" [I plead the 5th]
(Patrick Doyle/Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.)

What do you think about very often?
"Secrets of the Castle" [I wish I knew what said secrets are.]
(John Williams/Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban)

What is 2 + 2?
"Amanda" [I like this kind of Math.]
(Alisha Duo/Quiet Songs)

What do you think of your best friend?
"The Taming of Smeagol" [No wonder I am so messed up if my best friend is like Smeagol]
(Lord of the Rings Trilogy)

What do you think of the person you like?
Passerà [Our time together is limited?]
(Aleandro Baldi/Il Divo)

What is your life story?
"I'm not that Girl" [I certainly hope not.]
(Kristen Chenoweth/Wicked)

What do you want to be when you grow up?
"We have all been blind" [An eye doctor maybe?]
(Andrew Lloyd Weber/Phantom of the Opera)

What do you think of when you see the person you like?
"Far From the Home I Love" [Apparently I think of traveling, or a new start]
(John Williams/Fiddler on the Roof)

What will you dance to at your wedding?
"True Love's Kiss" [How Appropriate]
(Amy Adams/James Marsden - Enchanted)

What will they play at your funeral?
"Neville's Waltz" [Apparently they will be remembering my bad dancing.]
(Patrick Doyle, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire)

What is your hobby/interest?
"Angel of Music" [Teaching women from a distance while planning to seduce them sounds like a good hobby to have.]
(Andrew Lloyd Weber/Phantom of the Opera)

What is your biggest fear?
"Barbossa is Hungry" [I think that is enough to scare anyone really]
(Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl)

What is your biggest secret?
"I Will Be There For You" [I probably should tell you that.]
(Jessica Andrews/Prince of Egypt)

What do you think of your friends?
"Grazing in the Grass" [They're all sheep!]
(Raven-Symone/Lion King 1 1/2)

What will you post this as?
"Make it Through" [I hope you really do make it through.]
(Linda Davis/Randy Travis - Prince of Egypt)

Cat Look-a-Likes

I think if that cat were to add a beard, it would look more like Albus Dumbledore.


more animals

Missionary Friday

About time he writes back...

Dear Family and Friends,

Unfortunately, the student library likes to find any excuse to not let visitors in and so this week I am bound by snail mail. Rather than waste time and space more on this, I’ve got a lot to say because this letter covers two weeks. So, let’s get this letter started.

First off, I want to wish Mom a happy birthday because I forgot to do that before. I also want to wish A and S a happy birthday too even though they still have a while before they have their birthdays. I thought I should because I was on the subject.

Next in response to some letters about the corruption and weather in Chicago; here are some jokes I’ve heard on these subjects. 1st, you know you’ve been living in Chicago to long when you honestly have stopped caring about all of the crime and corruption that goes here! Next, the weather; “A bunch of New Yorkers decided “We like crime and corruption and all but darn it, it is just not cold enough” and thus when they moved Chicago was born.”

Now on to the events of the past two weeks: Thursday, two weeks ago was Zone Conference. It was about the same as expected. I did learn one interesting thing. The difference between a call and an assignment: Here is an example: “I was called to serve a mission for the LDS Church. I was assigned to serve in South Chicago. That was about it for Zone Conference. After Zone Conference I started feeling funny but decided to just sleep it off. Friday, I was not any better but I toughed it out. Saturday, I felt absolutely horrible and I knew I needed a doctor when the pain shrunk to my kidney areas. I finally, got to the hospital on Sunday, where they confirmed what I already knew I had. My kidney infection had returned! For me the saying that witch does not kill you makes you stronger would be more accurately worded than witch doesn’t kill you, isn’t trying hard enough and needs to double its efforts. This kidney infection seems to be attempting that.

I stayed in Advocate Good Samaritan Hospital in Chicago from Sunday until Wednesday night. I observed small differences between this hospital and the ones back home. The one thing that is the same is that I’ve noticed that hospitals are basically just hotels for sick people. You get a nice bed, room service, good food and at the end you receive a huge bill.

I got a single room with a TV staring me right in the face. It seemed to be screaming: “Watch me. Nobody will care!" But because that is against the mission rules, I somehow managed to avoid temptation and I did not watch it. Without TV, there was nothing to do besides read scriptures and nap but I could only do so much of that. Time seemed to pass very slowly and I nearly lost what little sanity I have. During my stay at the hospital, I missed District Meeting and President’s interviews on Monday. I think I talked to President R. enough in the hospital to have that qualify as an interview though. I also missed Zone Activity on Wednesday. They started by playing snow football at that point then went to the High Park Building and jut just hung out. It was nothing special. So I did not miss much.

When I talked to President R. in the hospital, he said he could have had me go to the hospital in the Chicago City Zone but he likes the Good Samaritan Hospital in Naperville Zone better. From this I concluded that there is a good chance that I will be getting transferred to the Naperville Zone.

I really think that this would be a bad idea. I think I should stay one more transfer in Beverly. I have prayed about this and I think I can do more good here than in Naperville. Elder C. said that if the AP’s or MP had known more about my problem, I would never have been sent to Chicago in the first place. I think they are blowing it way out of proportion. I’ve gone years between infections, so even if it does happen again, there’s little chance of it happening on my mission again.

I really hope I don’t go to Naperville. There are so many things I’ve heard that I don’t like. First, you get fed every night – Translation: Your going to get fat and gain back all of the weight you lost. Second: Naperville has rich white people. Translation: They are rich snobs who won’t like you and will judge and look down on you because of all your tiny imperfections. Three, the people are tight with anything and if you even come close to the line, the MP will know and you get chewed out. Forth, Naperville has beautiful women, who flaunt what they’ve got. No mistranslation here. Those women are beautiful and practically throw themselves at the missionaries just to torture them and make themselves feel better.

I like this Zone better. We may not get fed every night but it gives something took forward too. Here we have poor black humble black people who do not judge us badly. As far as rules go, hear it ifs a little looser and you don’t have to constantly worry about all of the little things. Also here we may not have as many good looking women but the ones here do not throw themselves at you. Perhaps, I am just overreacting and it won’t be that bad. When I first heard about what it was like in Beverly, I was terrified, but now I don’t want to leave. I’ve prayed about it and if I do go to Naperville next transfer, then I figure, my kidney infection was no accident and God is putting me there because there will be someone who needs me to teach them in the 6 weeks. I, however, still have to stay here one more transfer. Our area is just starting to pick up. Elder C. has been here over 7 months already and is due. If both of us get transferred that would kill the area all over again. Of course, I could be getting worked over nothing. Let’s just wait to see what happens next transfer.

Elder C. told me while I was in the hospital, that he has spent more time in hospitals on his mission than at all before and the only time he wants to go back is when his wife is giving birth. I just laughed because I know how unlikely that is.

Elder C. also told me of his experience with the AP’s when I was gone. He said they do lots of office work and put up with a lot of crap from all around the mission. Nobody wants to go AP. We prefer doing real mission work.

When I was released from the hospital, President R. told me to take it easy for a few days. So I took it easy on Thursday then got right back to work. Friday, I taught three lessons. The first was my first in a public place instead of a private home. It felt weird but it was a good experience. Her family is devout Catholic and she’s been exposed to lots of Anti stuff. She was too afraid to have us in her home. We taught the restoration and straightened her out about the anti junk. We also visited an inactive who told us his story of conversion then becoming inactive. It is amazing how lots of inactives just need missionary visits to get them back to church. On Saturday we worked like we did on Friday.

This week after District Meeting, Elder C. decided to make me Sr Comp for the day. He said it would be good training but I was not sure. I would prefer the Elder V. route and go Jr comp all the way but what happens will happen. I was going to tract through Media referrals but I felt inspired to do something different than normal. We spent the day tracting through the area book instead. It was a good experience. I had never looked through the area book before so I figured now was a good time. I contacted some old investigators and even made some appointments.

Monday night was my first exchange. So, I spent Tuesday in Pullman with Elder Ca. I was amazed when I taught one of their investigators. He has problems with the Word of Wisdom. He says his wife drives him to drink and smoke. I was just going to share some scriptures with him but when I spoke; someone else was using my voice. They instead, told him that when when his wife gives him trouble he needs to find another outlet for his stress. My voice said something else that I did not get but he understood it perfectly. When we left, we committed him to play snow football whenever he feels stressed because of his wife. Also, with this investigator, he told us that his family used to live in Tennessee and his grandfather knew a T Fields when he lived there. Dad, do we have family in Tennessee? I think we should check and see if we do. We should check if T. Meadows has had his temple work done. Please let me know that goes. Other than this investigator, the rest of the day was pretty much the same as it would have been in Beverly.

I must go. I am tired of hand writing this letter.



Love Elder Fields

Great Flying Forks!

I think I was culturally insulted tonight. I'm not quite sure. I allude to when an Iraqi reporter threw a shoe at President Bush in December. Only in my case it was a fork flung half-heartedly to the ground near my feet. I mean who knows how many foreign insults there are, and who knows what a somewhat chucked fork means. Maybe I was meant to pick it up and wash it? Maybe it means I am lower than the dogs? Or that maybe I am considered too inhuman to talk to in person?

Whatever the case, I shall surely have to do some research and find out what insults there are for flung forks. And though I doubt my curiosity will abate in pursuit of such cultural knowledge, I want it known that I bear the fork-hurler or her co-conspirator no ill-will. Surely my actions must be comparable to President Bush's by going into foreign territory and making a mess of things. And perhaps too, like Bush; the reparations, feelings of good will and shared tribute have come too late in the game to stop the gulf from widening, to point that forks have been hurled half-heartedly. Unlike Bush, I have no troops stationed in other sovereign lands, and thus can fully embrace diplomacy by staying the minimal necessary for my diplomatic errand and leaving as quickly as possible. Tis the only way to maintain peace and ensure that forks are not flung half-heartedly again. I dare not wish to offend anyone of any sovereign nation and I hope that the decrease of my occupation may bring what many search for: peace.

Or... I could take a page out of Israel's book and cause as much destruction without caring. Though it is tempting, it hasn't worked for Israel yet and I doubt I'll fare much better.

So here is hoping that no one half-heartedly throws a fork at you. If it does happen, know that you are not alone in your shame.

Made With Love

Two weeks ago Yellow MM gained cookies by default and received them today. The cookies were made last night though, with pictures included.

There was a bit of going back and forth as well. I went to Katydid's to pick her up, swung by the Creamery to buy some things and headed to apartment where we started to get everything organized. It turns out that we didn't have measuring cups, or large enough bowls in my apartment, so we went back to Katydid's to make it.

We started on it, but may have intruded on Katydid's roommates', Heavens To, dinner and she appeared upset that we were there as Katydid had told her that we would be at my place making the cookies. Well we mixed everything together and decided to head back to my place as to risk no further offense.

Here is what the cookie dough looked like:

Lacking a plate to put the cookies on once cooked, we placed them in this:

And with enough cookies soon looked like this:

See, even Katydid likes them:

though she resented a little that I took her photo, I suppose...


But the cookies turned out great, and a dozen were delivered to Yellow MM and a dozen to Katydid's roommates as a peace offering. We'll see if said peace offering was accepted.

Also Wally III has stated I cannot participate in "Singles Awareness Day", that I am banned. I promptly told him that I would be participating in a better holiday; "Making Singles Self-Aware Day."

And in terms of stuff I blogged about before, I do have a job now. I'll expound later. I am also have contacted the company that sent me the textbook by mistake. They said they would send me a return mailer thing, but nothing has showed up thus far. Odd.

Sounds Like My Brother Too.

I read stuff from Lolcats, and I thought I'd post this today. Enjoy.


more animals

No Smile Left Behind

I'm smiling, just because. No reason really. I'm just smiling. And inexplicably speaking in fragment sentences. But that's because I am smiling. You should do it too.

Embrace the power of the smile side. Yes. I did just watch Star Wars. Katydid hadn't seen Episode 3. It's quite a sad movie. Nevertheless I still smile. As I think of the internal conflict that Ninja-Pirate-Jedi Squirrels must have. Especially if they are flying squirrels.

Anywhat, I am just smiling. I can't really stop. I don't think I want to.

You should too. C'mon, all the cool kids are doing it.

The Great Roller Coaster

Last night I got into my car, feeling strangely happy, enjoying life overall. But reality hit today and I realized again that said happiness is causing another to be unhappy, and that there was nothing that I can do to fix it. Well, not without making another miserable and maybe myself included.

I would like to be able to do something, anything really, but I am not sure what can be done. Of course on some level I am to blame, I could and should have done things differently, but there is no point in dwelling on that too much, as it will do no good. What has happened, has happened.

Just what pains me that because of certain choices made, a good friend is now unhappy. But what makes it complicated is that the choice I made not only has made me happy, but another as well. So going back on that choice is not a fair option for her, nor is entirely fair for me.

All I can really do is offer counsel and advice, which isn't much considering her pain and remorse comes from the decision I made. Even if something were to happen to nullify the choice I made, I couldn't exactly make a decision that favors her, cause though it would be to help her be happy, it would only be a short term thing and wouldn't be a permanent solution. In fact it would most likely cause her more pain than she feels now.

So what can I do? There isn't much that I can do on a realistic level.

Oh well. Here's hoping I can find a time-machine to prevent me from being an idiot.

Or... another solution would be to set her up on some dates... maybe Great Grandfather might be willing... (No, he's not anyone's great grandfather in case you are wondering)

I guess that is the only thing I can do. Hopefully she accepts said proposition.

That may mean I may have to dedicate a blog post to her, so you all know how awesome she is. I may just do that. I will have to ask permission first.

I Already Did This!

Well a few days ago Yellow M&M tagged me to write seven random things about myself, and had it been anything else, I would have done it immediately, but I thought I had done something like it before, and by searching, it appears that I indeed have done this exact meme before, except without the small graphic.

Of course I will do this one, but so you all know, if there are any future memes that are repeated, I won't do them and I am not tagging anyone except Katydid and Unit of Energy as I don't think they did it before, even though they have already been tagged.

Also, you want seven random things. You're crazy right? But I suppose I will thwart claims that I am not spontaneous enough. Yes Chillylint, I am speaking to you. Cheesecake! OK, that was more random than spontaneous, but it doesn't matter.

1. I can oink like a pig.

2. I can also flare my nose.

3. I am amused and enthralled slightly at how the two make Katydid laugh.

4. My girlfriend and I share the same birthday. Luckily it's not on the same day.

5. Unit of Energy and Heavens To, Katydid's roommates, might make me a part of their family order. It's complicated, I may divulge later.

6. I almost immediately recognize any rainbow that leads from Earth to another place as the bridge to Asgard.

7. I say #6 because I watched Thor Vs The Hulk last night where the Hulk ripped Thor a new one.

And a bonus:

8. I am about to entreat myself to some of Katydid's home cooking. I have never tasted it before, and if this is my last post, you'll know why.

So farewell, until we meet again!